Injuries**

Let me take you back to Critmas Day 1995, the family is gathered at the outlaws place in Pennant Hills north of Sydney in NSW. Santa got me these very cool shorts, and the big guy in red got my 5 y.o nephew elbow pads, knee pads and helmet. They had a sketchy old skatey and I hadn't skateboarded for about 5 years or so. I had done a couple of previous incident free bombing runs down Hillcrest Road Pennant Hills pre Critmas and all was OK. As a responsible uncle I had taken my 3 y.o nephew on a couple of these quick runs down the hill - he fitted neatly between my legs so we could both fit on board. Safety gear, overrated and inherently unnecessary - I was old school. Where was I - yep, that's right Critmas Day and the Penno neighbourhood was alive with kiddies on their new bikes, scooters and other assorted wheeled toys. I managed to coax my nephew out for a run down Hillcrest Road, so named for good reason. He had all of the safety gear on from Santa, I had my new shorts and an old pair of high top runners. All of the family were out to watch and all of the neighbourhood families watching their own kidlets on their new wheels. Everyone was on the street to watch this 6'4" lunatic try to maim and disfigure his young nephew. We started off at the top of the hill together both standing Goofy, with him tucked in with me and off we went - the only way was down and bugger me if it didn't go seriously downhill bloody quickly from there. He got a bit spooked at about 35km/h and moved a bit too much which upset our equilibrium sufficiently that a minor speed wobble began to develop, Within a poofteenth of a second a mild speed wobble became a death wobble and in slow motion as it was happening at the time, it was unrecoverable. All I could think about was how this poor little kid was going to get damaged because he trusted his uncle to deliver him safely from the top of the hill to the bottom - clearly that was not going to happen. The aforementioned death wobble reached critical severity and it was time to either beat a hasty exit and jump or to be catapulted from this spawn of the devil. I grabbed my nephew, bundled him into me and jettisoned the evil piece of wheeled equipment. as it happens, right outside Pennant Hills Police Station. We'd had a good head of speed up and our rendezvous with the bitumen went better than I had expected. My nephew was upset, understandably crying but unharmed, in fact there was not even a scratch of any of Santa's safety gear. I was in a different position, however. The lovely walking shorts that had been so lovingly wrapped by a member of the family were barely able to be described as shorts - they were cactus - utterly destroyed. No broken bones, but my dignity was another story - it was shattered. The walk of shame had to be done. I had to walk back up the hill with all of the families out on the street who had witnessed my majestic fall from grace and fall from the demonically possessed skateboard. There were many who did the tsk, tsk which I took to mean that I had allowed them to point out demonstrably to their own children why they shouldn't play on the road. All that I was wearing on our ill fated trip down Hillcrest Road was my ex-shorts, so you can imagine the work required to be done by my body to mend all of the missing components now devoid of skin. Ankles, calf, knee, thigh, hip, forearm, elbow, shoulder and back were all missing substantial layers of skin. This was not the worst thing however, using a nail brush at the outdoor tap to get the pieces of gravel out of the open wounds was an experience I can only liken to combing your hair with a potato peeler. Pain is personal though. To give an idea of the recovery work required by my body, it was three weeks before I was allowed back into the marital bed. We still talk about Critmas Day 1995 and my nephew, now 23 still talks to me and surprisingly doesn't kick me when he sees me.

Fast forward to World Youth Day Sydney 2008...Friday 18th July, my daughter Brittany rings me at work to say that my wife is staying in Pt Macquarie for the weekend with my daughter Belle. Conversation goes something like this 'The Pope has his pilgrims everywhere and the streets of Sydney are closed to traffic; wanna go for a skate'. Affirmative was my call and with the blessing of the Police we weaved in and out of pilgims all night...on the way home at about 11pm, skateboarding over the Harbour Bridge heading north I missed seeing a checkerplate cover. Doing maybe 20km/h the 'possessed by demons' skateboard stops instantly at the said checkerplate cover - I continue in an undignified version of simulated flight. All good while in flight but the landing was atrocious. Buggered elbow, knee, lots of skin gone; DNA left on eastern walkway of the Harbour Bridge and have destroyed another pair of flairs. Daughter laughing hysterically - at which time I found that my dignity was lying beside my my DNA, on the walkway of the bridge. Thanks Pope.

The one thing we learn from history is that we never learn from history. 15 years to the day - yes, Critmas Day 2010. we were in Pennant Hills with the outlaws again - you'll detect a tradition. We went out bombing hills in another hilly area of Sydney called Cherrybrook. We had a good 2 km downhill section with smooth bitumen and lovely meandering bends. My eldest daughter, 18 and very cocky, wouldn't wear gloves, knee pads or helmet. Bombing hit number 1, all good - uneventful and good fun. Episode 2, she got down too low and got death wobbles. She was lucky and got away with both knees and a hand grazed. Suffice to say that her body got it's chance to carry out repairs but grazed knees on a girl don't look so flash. Check her knees in Heelside mag - she is a featured chick longboarder.

I have repeated this skin eradicating exercise at the Pumpstation in the Blue Mountains at MOTH 2011 and then again at the Hopkin School of Speed in February 2011. My DNA is now on the roadway and in the dirt at the pumpy - woohoo. One day I might learn....but somehow I doubt it. I always wear a helmet though.

I recently purchased Cooper' Kruize's leathers for my 14 y.o daughter, Belle, so that there is no chance for the tradition to continue. I also bought Luca's fullface for racing.....she'll be safe.